I've been having a lot of thoughts lately. All completely random. Okay, here we go:
1. There are people I was friends with in high school but no longer talk to. One of them I had a fight with a few years ago and since then haven't heard from. I have to say, I miss her terribly. She was there for me when I was going through rough times. I wish she would forgive me or talk to me again.
2. When it comes to finding a boyfriend I find that 2 things occur:
1. I like him...he has a girlfriend.
2. He likes me...he's a total creep.
WHY can't it be "I like him...he likes me"??? There has to be at least one single guy who isn't a creep on this campus. ARGH!
3. I need to get back into playing the clarinet again. After my disappointing year at Rutgers in 2010 I haven't touched my clarinet (except for a semester at Landmark College last year from being in the Chamber Ensemble). My poor Buffet hasn't been touched. It felt amazing to hold it when I was cleaning it this week. I want to play it, but the only place I can do so is in the practice rooms. Mason Gross has made me feel like an outsider. I go near a practice room and feel as if I don't deserve to be in it. I need to get the courage to play.
4. I need to stop being afraid of singing in public. I used to sing in choirs and even in the shower. Since my schedule didn't allow it I wasn't able to be in a choir this semester. And as for the shower...I feel as if people are going to judge me. It's stupid I know, but my voice is a very sacred thing to me.
5. I WANT TO DO MORE ACTING! I think I auditioned for one thing this semester and didn't get a role. I really want to be in productions (lead or ensemble) but I've been too nervous in auditions. I used to rock at auditions. What happened???
6. I have SO many great friends that I feel I'm not spending enough time with.
7. I need to write more - poems and stories. It's already November and I decided not to do NaNoWriMo this year. It's too much work and too much of a hassle to balance with all the schoolwork I have to do. But I really do need to write again. My only problem? I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO WRITE ABOUT!
Well that's it for this journal. Hope you all enjoyed my thoughts (and rants). Till next time!